Interesting question there, ‘why cheat?’. It seems to me that the whole purpose in cheating is to gain happiness in what ever it is that one is cheating at. If it is a test, the person is looking at getting a better grade (short changing future results and benefits to look better now). When cheating on a diet, again future results are being swapped out for a moments delight.
The very act of cheating implies that you are trying to gain an advantage to happiness. But as one preacher put it, happiness and happy are built on the same root word, ‘hap’ which means: luck, lot, occurrence, accident, happening, or chance. All of that also implies that it could go just the opposite way for the person seeking the advantage.
So with that in mind why do people cheat on their marriages? The vows at the wedding ceremony generally include “till death do you part”. That if anything would make marriage an endurance test. Almost a ‘who lives longer race’ if you will. With that being the case the one who cheats isn’t getting ahead in the race at all, merely short changing themselves. They are taking themselves out of the race; sort of disqualifying themselves from finishing what they started.
Hebrews 13:4 says “Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.”
Sex is to be exercised only in the bonds of marriage. God had declared back in Genesis 1:28 for the first couple to “be fruitful and multiply”. The whole point of marriage is to raise a family not to fulfill your personal lusts.
Before man fell into sin God created marriage, for the very first miracle that Jesus performed (John 2:1-10 turning water into wine) he blessed a marriage, Paul writes about the sanctity of marriage as it represents the relationship between Jesus and his church, Ephesians 5:22-28.
M.R. DeHann wrote: “Compare the time you spend on adorning your body with the time spent in the Word and prayer and testimony, and you will find the reason for your spiritual immaturity.” I would put it this way in regards to marriage, compare the time you spend on your marriage with the time spent on wishing for someone else and you will find a good portion of reason for why your marriage is not what it should be in the first place. A wandering mind is already cheating in the heart, so said Jesus (Matthew 5:28).
Lastly you would notice with me the last part of Hebrews 13:4 “but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.” That word ‘whoremongers’ means fornicators or more specifically prostitutes. In so cheating they are selling themselves one way or another, it’s not always about money. Fornicating is sex before marriage and adultery is sex outside the bounds of marriage. The only lasting thing being gained by cheating is trouble. God will judge. Even king David when he had his affair with Bathsheba, though God forgave his sin, he still had consequences to deal with for the rest of his life. He repaid it four-fold. The child that was born from his adultery died, he had a daughter raped by one of her half brothers, that half brother/son of David was killed by another son, and that son tried to usurp David’s throne in so doing he raped 10 of David’s concubines for the whole world to see. David’s cheating cost him nothing but family trouble for the rest of his life and beyond. He gained no advantage, no lasting satisfaction, he did not get ahead, and he found no happiness. The lust that was there burned out quickly and cost more than he ever thought that it could. Our sins will find us out one way or another, Proverbs 6:32.
The Epistle to the Hebrews by: Adolph Saphir
Hebrews by: M.R. DeHaan
Hebrews by: John Phillips